TSA: Passengers advised they can no longer bring Snakes on a plane.

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In a major coup for New Line Cinema, the TSA today announced that in addition to hair care and soap gel products, passengers were no longer allowed to bring Snakes on a Plane.

Frequent Flier Samuel L. Jackson was quoted as saying “HISSSS ain’t no country I’ve ever heard of! Do they speak ENGLISH in HISSSS? Say HISSSS again! I DARE YOU! I DOUBLE DARE YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!! Say HISSSSS one more god damned time!!!”

The TSA had no comment, as they were busy staring intently at a bottle of Pert Plus.

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